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    2/18/2007

    除夕

     
    人们不辞辛苦不怕拥挤不嫌麻烦不停花钱的春节到了,每次拎着大包小包从象锅沸开水的超市出来,我都木木的,没有孩提时又蹦又跳的喜悦之情,我想是不是自己骨子里对任何形式的喧嚣都会有隐隐的抵触。
     
    07年一下就混了两个月走了,全然无知觉。想想06年即将过去的弥足珍贵的最后一刻,我还坐在被窝里,听着王凡瑞的《青春》,盘算着自己的昨天今天明天,跟朋友写信,两年来写的第一封信。email发达了,写字就退化了,所以现在手绘的东西让人倍感亲切,大受推崇。
     
    回忆是一种沉陷,在回想过去的一年时,好像又活在定格的那一幕幕。我总结去年还算是有一些小小的自我突破,不管中间怎么别别扭扭,内心冲突之后,总还是向前迈了一小步。比如,硬着头皮穿着小了一号的裙子在台上表演小天鹅,这可比让我喝半斤白酒更有挑战性;在一堆不快乐后,还是去面对考试;用我的高尚情操指导身体力行啥啥的。
     
    此外,我还收获了两个我喜欢的女人,周晓枫和赵玫。她们告诉我如何做一个女人,一个美丽的女人,一个因智慧而更加美丽的女人。虽然,目前,自己还是个灰头土脸的丫头,羞涩不自信,但心里却有万千期待和憧憬。梦如潮水。
     
    去年5月在夜市上买了一只招福猫,一眼就在百猫群里相中她,于是用红绳子串着套在右手腕上,直到今天从未摘下过。紧张慌乱的时候,总会不由自主的摸摸她。每次看到她的笑脸,心里就特安定。我想这就是缘分,她属于我,她很贵。
     
    除夕的夜里,我祈求今年剩下的日子一家人平安喜乐。我希望自己仍然能有一些改变,哪怕只是微妙的变化,因为只有改变才会有可能进步。我愿自己能够拥有一种朴素的、温暖的生活态度。

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